"Sighhh...I think I hear Ian coming."
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"SOB! Jake, Mommy doesn't UNDERSTAND!"
"I want to fly out the window and SHE WON'T LET ME!...Was that your ear? Sorry..."
"Am I kicking you in the head? Sorry...ANYWAY, Mommy doesn't let me be FREE!"
"Heeeeyyyyy...you're a really good step ladder, Jake! And a good listener! I feel better already!"
"I'm happy now, Mommy! Hugs from Jake always fix the problem!"
"Being allowed to sit on the windowsill and see the world doesn't hurt, either."
"Yeah, yeah...third floor, danger, blah, blah...whatever, Mommy!"
"Kathleen, you know I don't like to tell you how to parent your kid, but for goodness sake...invest in some window guards!"
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